He lives, he dies. He's reborn. Over and over, never ending. It happens to everyone. Gideon just had the misfortune to remember the cycle, break it and shape it.
Lucy is woven into his shaped version of being rebirth and twisting time to what he thought it should be. He's tried to unweave her more than once. It never works out. No matter what he does, she is there. He can only save the people needs too, to stop the evil, to make the world what he wants if she's there.
It's frustrating. He can never figure out why. Why her?